The desire to do good, to be doing something worthy.
Beaten down by anxiety, steadily beating on the inside.
Pretending all is well and light to the world.
Battling the darkness all alone, pushing down the demons.
Talking to myself, yelling and screaming.
Tears held back not ever to be seen.
My inside feels like exploding, expressed in waves of rage.
Transformed into smiles for everyone else’s benefit.
Every day I feel like what’s left of my true self is dying.
Only then to be held by hope and said desire.
Life goes on, day in and day out.
I’m still here fighting.